I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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