everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
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