this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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