i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
