He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
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