i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
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