I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
