she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
i need some magic done to my vagina
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
Randomize
