Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Randomize
