So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
My dad just said "fuck circus"
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
