At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
