I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Randomize
