all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Randomize
