sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
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