What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize
