That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
So here I am, sexting at work.
Randomize
