their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
