there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
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