Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
