It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
Randomize
