PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
Randomize
