just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Randomize
