Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
