I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
