508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
