Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
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