You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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