ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
Just cropdusted the office
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
