I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Randomize
