is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
