I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
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