i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
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