I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Randomize
