this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
