Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
We smell like vodka and hangover
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