I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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