Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
