sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Randomize
