At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
