I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Randomize
