Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
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