Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
