So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
