We won't sleep together?
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Randomize
