He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
