Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
did you just send me my own nude
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
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