So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
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