you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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