Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
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