i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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