Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
Randomize